Hough Counseling and Assessments PLLC

675 E. Big Beaver, Suite 101
Troy, Michigan 48083

(248) 528-0157


Where Has All the Kindness Gone?

Posted on: May 7th, 2019

Where Has all the Kindness Gone? Looking at our present political and social climate I find myself asking where has the spirit of compromise, kindness and civility gone. In my nearly 49 years of living I can say I remember a time when our leaders addressed conflict with the idea of compromise as a means for resolution. Is compromise considered to be an obsolete concept? As a therapist I meet with individuals, couples and families. Conflict within these relationships usually has much to do with lack of effective communication and an unwillingness to compromise. I often ask client’s what they consider to be a barrier to compromise. The following are some common responses: 1. I don’t think I’m wrong. They need to change. 2. If I compromise the other person will take advantage. 3. If I compromise, I will appear vulnerable and weak. Without compromise there is no movement. Think of driving down the road and two cars come to an intersection with flashing red lights. Without the ability to compromise there will surely be a crash and potentially substantial damage. Think of our relationships as those intersecting cars each wanting to go their own way, but needed to compromise and proceed with caution. Compromise is an essential part to any healthy relationship. If each person compromises, then inevitably everyone gets a bit of what they want.

Author Alicia Lurry MA LPC CRC

Alicia Lurry MA LPC CRC